Jusdina

Sometimes if i were to ask someone on the street if they have known a person really well…Not in terms of the duration neither it is how well u comunicate wif that person…i was quite convinced that it actually takes a lifetime to understand a person…Well the reason is that humans are ever changing..I am not really sure if u need a lifetime to understand yourself..Anyway, i was once questioned by my lecturer abt my weakness and strengths. My response was that, my strengths can be my weakness and vice versa. And if i were to say that remaining slient and keeping my cool when i am angry wif a person was my strength, how wrong i was..If i were to do that in a relationship, i will be heading for trouble big time..This situation is easily contradicted by that if a man really loves a woman, will he love to hear all the nasty things that a woman might say to him in a fit of anger? haha.. i wouldn’t know.. Ignorance is bliss…Is that so in a relationship?Gez. I think it depends how well u wanna utilize it on..Sounds really complicated..And getting misunderstood all the time..sigh.

Life has been tough on me these days…not exactly i mean abt bad luck…I guess it has been a part and parcel of life..If somethings that are inevitable, my guess is to accept it for the way it is..I am too bothered by lots of minor and major issues..i just want to stay focused..that is what i wanna do..Wanting to learn from experience and not repeat it. it may not be a bad thing afterall..provided that the coping methods and the solutions are correct… If i were to meet another …so called crisis in life..firstly, i think i wanna think calmly over what are my so called priorities and based on that to plan what will be my next step. To me, avoidance is not a way to solve a particular problem..However, it may be a temporary solution..to sort things out that is…

Sometimes, i really think that i tend to dwell onto certain issues..i dun think that is exactly healthy for the mind but to me, i may find it quite useful as in if i were to look for a solution..However, if i were to assume things….then i would like to tell you that that is perhaps one of my weakest points that i possess..Seriously, i have been wanting to refrain my mind into assuming things..

Lastly, i hope that  certain issues…which is a bit diffcult to resolve (thats where it involves the human’s mentality) …Its kind of straining to the mind actually..to be resolved through time, understanding and acceptance.

Haha…The feeling of going on a holiday was simply….not so good..so boring..Anyway, was because that i hadn’t planned anything this yr for my holiday..So sigh once again..I went to take care of my granny coz she had a eye op to remove the cateract from the right eye..Wasn’t a good experience lar. So i learnt how to cook rice at her place..I didn’t do a very good job at first..My rice turned out to be porridge..ya..try cooking rice on a stove and u will be grateful to that person who invented the rice cooker..coz its quite though for me..u have to need lots of patience..That is.

During my 5 day stay at her place, i couldn’t go on msn..sigh..coz there is no com at her place..I felt so bad not talking to my dear and he got to wait for me to go online instead..Feel the desperation? Coz he is in America for a holiday..Honestly from the bottom of my heart, not seeing him for a day felt as though he has gone away from me for a YEAR..yup its that bad.At first, i thought that 1wk plus wouldn’t be so bad compared to him going into army in 1 yrs time..I wanted to tell him that i’m not able to contact him for these few days, but then i couldn’t find anyone to help me pass this msg to him lar..So in the end i managed to chat wif him online today when i’m finally home..So HAPPY! Ok..for all those who reads my blog will start to think that i’m over reacting. But seriously the feeling is absolutely different when someone so close to u has gone away be it temporary or for good.The feeling will always be there if u have that someone in our heart. Trust me.

Haha..Life has been peaceful for me..For now..Luck has been on my side…There is nothing more that i can ask for…Counting down the days to my Holidays! YAY! Finally…Long awaited hols…haha..So that i can spend it with that special someone …(Laughs)..Can’t wait. hehe..I admit that i have neglecting him..Because of my attachments..Nevertheless, i can makeup to him later during my hols. Today has been special for the both of us..I am glad that we have made it thus far..i hope that we can persevere…to face the odds together..The road Hasn’t been easy.But i have faith in him.. Surely there must be a way to every problem..Anyway…for all the commitments that he has kept or he mentioned..i truly appreciate that..Never had a chance to tell him that..i hope that he knows..the way i felt towards him..

I hate attachments. No doubt about that…I don’t really have time for anything nowadays…No mood to do anything..Still thinking that i have one last paper, which is the bioscience paper to go…Man…that really makes me sick..Still anxious about my exam results when all those ppl in other polys are already starting sch…How bad can that be huh? Life nowadays are so crappy…Can’t wait to finish my attachments and  go on a holiday. Can’t wait to catch up wif my friends and my the other half…He thinks that i am neglecting him…sigh..

These are my pals in sch…Really miss those who are not attached to the same wd as me.

Omg…This week has come and gone without my acknowledgement. Actually, i am feeling rather kind of confused and sick this week? Busy explaining my stand to all those who don’t get it ? i really don’t get the idea of doing so much explainations and honestly i am exhausted. i am just praying hard that my parents will accept my "the other half". i am expecting no more, no less. If you truly love someone or rather, i am sure that it would be nice to recieve blessings from friends and families..However, i don’t really know what have i done by not deserving it. Isn’t this funny? Alright, maybe its up to them to make up their mind. It takes time and tremendous effort for them to come to terms with it. But even then, its alright if someone doesn’t get it still.. Even i am still thinking hard, trying to salvage the situation…Do u understand?

Looks like i have grounded myself at home for abt a week? Besides going to church, i have to face the 4 walls in my room…I realli think that my life is that boring..Anyway,  right now i am stuck in making decisions for myself. Sigh…i think i can tell u in life, it is all abt making decisions..Thats what i do not like doing…Sadly, i do not have a choice..So many choices and different paths to take…But which one is the ideal one..haha..i am referring to my career next time..yup..Late nights, burying my head in books..i guess its only a temporary thing for me now…i think only my classmates will understand what i am trying to say here…Because i kept on procrastinating in front of them…haha..There is a word that says " My health is ruled by my head, so get in touch with positive emotions". i think thats so true, coz i have lots of negative thoughts in my head nowadays..Losing sleep, falling sick and dreamt abt my lecturer…Alright,..nothing is worse than that…haha…

Alright…..It has been ages since i last updated my blog…Anyway,the CNY celebrations for me has been a whole lot of fun..Going visiting as usual, going to catch a movie with my friends. Other than that, school…quite stressful…only my classmates will undersand what i am trying to say here…so i guess i have to hang in there until next yr…hehe…i have no choice..Oh well, this semester’s work is interesting…doing something really new. i guess life is all about learning new things and exploring new dimensions..

haha…School’s started..Another semester of hectic schdule for me…Thank god i still have my friends beside me…supporting me in whatever i do..As they always say, god chose our parents to be in our families,but friends are families that we chose for ourselves..And i think that’s so true..Now i did realise that friends are not only to accompany us around but they will still be with us during our diffcult times…So do cherish our friends and appreciate the little things they have done for us…

….As they always say friends are families that we choose for ourselves….So glad i have my friends who stood behind me in times of good and bad.